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Let me off the phone! Your customer service is hurting your brand.

Have you ever had a positive experience with a Customer Service employee suddenly turn annoying near the end of the call? You know, the “Thank you so much for calling XYZ company, Number One in customer service…Is there anything else I can help you with? …I’d like to wish you a happy and joyful day, and a wonderful weekend too, and kiss your kids and pet your dog.”

“Uhhh, no thanks…bye.” Click.

What just happened? You morphed from someone who got help, resolved an issue and had a positive experience to an impatient person now thinking, “Oh god, please shut up and let me get off the phone.”

We’ve all been there. It’s not the rep’s fault. They are told to recite that bloated customer service script because doing so is company policy. Well, it shouldn’t be. Such mindless banter reflects poorly on your company and, especially, on your brand.

Here is why:

It’s not authentic—It’s too canned. Nobody believes it because nobody likes phony baloney.

It’s too fast—It’s so long and rambling that it’s uncomfortable for any listener to follow or respond to. Your rep, sensing discomfort, talks even faster just to get through it all.

It’s confusing—Just as the natural flow of the call reaches its ‘goodbye’ stage and it’s time to hang up, the senseless verbiage begins.

Parting impression—Leave your customers happy, satisfied and on a high note, not with a final impression of Buzz off, I’m done with you.

So why do Customer Service managers make their poor employees spew out this nonsense when the more often one repeats a lifeless line, the more canned it sounds. Sure, they want employees to be friendly and represent the company in a consistent fashion. Every brand should strive for that. Yet they should focus on hiring caring people who want to help, then letting them interact within a brand’s personality. Teach them what your brand represents and promises, what its traits are, then let them interact authentically and personably. A simple Thank you, if genuine, works wonders.

Candidly, cut the crap. Stop using these ridiculous closing scripts, painful for both parties to endure. Remember, the people calling are your customers. Honor them.

What do you think? Do these scripts enhance or inhibit the customer’s experience? What are some of your experiences?

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